Christmas On The Rocks | 2022 Christmas Movies

Here we are with another Christmas movie with a stupid title. Christmas On The Rocks sounds like it should be about bartending or a breakup or something. Nope. It has nothing to do with any of those. I’m really not sure how the title relates to the movie. And that isn’t the only stupid thing about it.

Jennifer and Sarah (Lyla Porter-Follows) are twin sisters. Sarah is supposed to be the event planner for an important corporate Christmas party at a ski lodge. However, she broke her leg the day before she was supposed to be there. Jennifer pretends to be Sarah and takes her place at the ski lodge.

This is such a dumb movie. At no point in time does Sarah do anything to help her poor sister. We only see Sarah via video calls and all she does is apologize for getting injured. There’s never any suggestions on how to fix problems. As a matter of fact, there’s no reason that Sarah couldn’t have gone with Jennifer to work the event. (Besides the fact that the same actress plays both roles and I don’t think UPtv has the budget for that kind of special effects.) She only broke her leg! Crutches are a thing!

No. Don’t watch Christmas On The Rocks. Throw it into the avalanche and forget it ever existed. And that is being nice.

Pentatonix: Around The World For The Holidays

Disney+ doesn’t have a lot of Christmas movies coming out this year. So I let them get away with calling Pentatonix: Around The World For The Holidays a movie when it’s really a special.

A capalla group Pentatonix is heading into the studio to record a new Christmas album. Sadly, they seem to have recorded every Christmas song ever written. When they go to take a break, their manager accidentally locks them in the mailroom. Thanks to Disney magic, they are able to hear holiday stories from their fans around the world. And we even get a few musical collaborations with them as well!

Did any of us expect the Pentatonix special to not be cheesy? Of course it’s cheesy! It’s basically the group in front of a green screen opening letters. Then we switch to the fan reading their letter as they write it and telling us all about the holiday traditions from their country. As cheesy as the special was, it was nice to see a variety of countries represented and how each country related to one of the Pentatonix members.

Should you watch it? If you are a fan of Pentatonix, sure. But if you don’t like the group, you probably aren’t going to like the special. The whole point of it is they are recording an album. And we do a cameo from Disney’s a capella group, Dcapella. I bet you didn’t even know they existed!

The Holiday Stocking | 2022 Christmas Movies

This year, Hallmark announced a new content initiative called Mahogany. Mahogany will be the Hallmark movies we have all come to know (and love?) “through the unique lens of Black culture.” Their first Christmas movie, The Holiday Stocking, aired on December 3.

Robert Holiday died recently but he is unwilling to move on until he can convince his sisters, Dani (Nadine Ellis) and Marlow (Tamala Jones), to reconcile. He comes back to Earth as RJ (B.J. Britt), a colleague of Robert’s, to send the women on a Christmas stocking scavenger hunt. It’s a tradition they did as kids and he’s hoping that it will bring them back together.

I loved this movie so much. Robert felt so much guilt for not bringing his family back together while he was still alive. It’s a real issue that a lot of families have. While it would have been awesome to see the three siblings solving the riddles together, it was even better to see an older brother doing something like this for his younger siblings. It warmed my heart.

The Holiday Stocking is a movie that everyone should go watch. There is a little romantic love but, much like Frozen, it’s more about familial love. Oh, and charity! There are so many ideas in this movie for charitable things people can do around the holidays. Watch this movie then go volunteer!

A New Orleans Noel | 2022 Christmas Movies

You would think that the Christmas movies would get better the closer we get to Christmas. But they keep getting more and more lame. Well, onto A New Orleans Noel.

Grace (Keshia Knight Pulliam) is a traveling architect. Her new job brings her to New Orleans to redecorate the home of Loretta Brown (Patti LaBelle), the praline queen. However, she was not told that she would be sharing the job with Anthony (Brad James), Loretta’s grandson. Sparks flew for Anthony when they were in college together. Will sparks fly for Grace now?

There are so many annoying things about this movie. One: Who hires an architect to redecorate a house? Even if they were redesigning it with knocking down walls and everything, that isn’t really an architect’s job. Two: We are set in New Orleans and we only get a few flavors of the city. If we’re going to be set in New Orleans, it has to be as much of a character as the actors are. Three: When are these people working? At the end of the movie, Grace gives Loretta photographs of her new kitchen. Not drawings, not blueprints (even though she tells Anthony in the next scene that the blueprints are done), but photographs. I think we get two scenes of them working. And one of those is Grace sketching a building in a park.

I really wanted the Patti LaBelle Christmas movie to be good. And, honestly, she is the best part of it. If you want to watch it for her, go for it. Otherwise, it’s just another boring movie to pop into the bin.

Scrooge: A Christmas Carol | 2022 Christmas Movies

In order to cleanse my palate, I flipped over to Netflix to see if Scrooge: A Christmas Carol was worth watching. I did not know it was a musical. That is two musicals based on A Christmas Carol this year. Interesting.

Ebenezer Scrooge (Luke Evans) is a miserable old man who will gladly step on poor people if it would be beneficial to himself. On Christmas Eve, his old business partner Jacob Marley (Jonathan Pryce) tells him that he will be visited by three spirits. The Ghost of Christmas Past (Olivia Colman), The Ghost of Christmas Present (Trevor Dion Nicholas), and The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come. Will the spirits be able to convince Scrooge to change his miserly ways?

While I love a good musical, I will admit that I didn’t like this at first. The animation is beautiful but the songs didn’t seem to fit. It wasn’t until The Ghost of Christmas Present appeared that I started to enjoy the songs. Thinking back, it’s possible that I was so caught off guard by the fact that this was a musical that I didn’t give myself a chance to actually enjoy the beginning parts. I will definitely go back and watch it again to see if that is the case.

Taking the songs out of it for a moment, I did love the way this version told the story. We are all very familiar with the story of Scrooge so it can be difficult to tell it in a new way that will keep people’s attention. I think that the Christmas Past portion was done very well and I loved the joy that Christmas Present had with being on Earth at Christmastime. All of this made a classic story interesting.

I think that fans of A Christmas Carol or animation in general would like this version of the story. But if you aren’t a fan of musicals….sorry, this one isn’t for you. As I said, I’m going to watch it again to see if I like it better now that I know it’s a musical. Sometimes even I get thrown off by a random song out of nowhere.

Christmas On Candy Cane Lane | 2022 Christmas Movies

Candace Cameron Bure’s Full House/Fuller House co-star, Andrea Barber, has joined her on Great American Family. It’s not particularly surprising since Bure is an executive producer on Christmas On Candy Cane Lane. I wonder how many people Bure is trying to convert to GAF….

Ivy (Andrea Barber) is the daughter of the Christmas maven, Muriel. After Muriel’s death, Ivy struggles to keep up with her mother’s standards.

Why does Great American Family love having movies that do nothing? It wanted to be a comedy. After all, it kept sticking Barber in slapstick situations. But then they wouldn’t let the joke land. They would just whirl off into another moment to try to make it romantic. At the same time, it wanted to be a mystery. Someone is messing with the candy cane decorations across the street. But we can’t focus on that too much because it takes away from the main characters. What we end up with is a movie that has a good premise but is trying to hard to be too many things. It’s almost like the writers had “Yes and” syndrome and didn’t know where to stop.

No, don’t watch this one. Even if you’re going for the “I love Kimmy Gibbler” route, Kimmy got way more jokes than this movie is willing to give. Christmas On Candy Cane Lane isn’t even worth turning on while you do chores. I think this is the first movie from Bure’s production company and it shows. You guys have been in entertainment forever. Do better. Also, I would love to credit more of the cast but they aren’t listed on the IMDb. What is up with that?

A Fabled Holiday | 2022 Christmas Movies

I don’t think I have liked a single movie starring Brooke D'Orsay. Ryan Paevey movies aren’t much better. At least A Fabled Holiday has a Lindsey Stirling cameo. That gives me something to look forward to.

Talia (Brooke D’Orsay) grew up wanting to be an author. She turned out to own a bookstore instead. Her childhood friend, Anderson (Ryan Paevey), became a doctor. As adults, the two have become disillusioned with life. During this Christmas season, they end up at the same inn in the town of Wunderbrook. A familiar town from their childhood with magical properties to heal the woes of anyone staying there.

Surprisingly, I found myself actually enjoying A Fabled Holiday. Sure, it follows the same Christmas tropes but it actually leans into those tropes. I’m not sure how much I can talk about this without giving too much of the plot away. I do want to say that I loved how the townspeople fit into the story. It was a perfect twist on the classic Christmas movie.

While I don’t think everyone would enjoy this one, I think it’s worth giving it a watch. If you’ve ever read a book and wondered what it would be like to live inside that world, A Fabled Holiday is for you. It might be enough to make believers out of all of us.

Cloudy With A Chance Of Christmas | 2022 Christmas Movies

I’m betting this was intentional but Cloudy With A Chance of Christmas makes me think of the children’s book (which was made into a movie), Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs. While there was a lot of food in Christmas, there were no meatballs. What a shame.

Bridget Torres (Valery M. Ortiz) is a weather forecaster for the evening news. This year she has been invited to host the channel’s annual Snow-cast in Leavenworth, WA. Unbeknownst to her, the morning show hosts, Drake (Brandon Quinn) and Tatum (Sarah Jane Morris), are actually hosting the special. Drama unfolds as Drake and Bridget get closer and the truth comes out about who was Drake’s first choice for morning show co-host.

Cloudy With A Chance Of Christmas was actually a cute movie. The little shops around the Leavenworth all had a story behind them and Drake was more than willing to share the stories of his hometown with Bridget. Instead of making their outings (not dates!) about the romance, it turned them into a history lesson which was cool and interesting. Bridget got to learn about Drake and the town at the same time.

What was more interesting was the big conflict. Instead of it being something stupid, it was something that actually effected Bridget’s career. And since Bridget didn’t get picked to be the morning show co-host, Tatum feels like she was the second choice. No one likes that feeling. It created an interesting dynamic between the two women that wasn’t about being romantic rivals but actual career rivals.

I do think Cloudy With A Chance Of Christmas is worth watching. Grab a few snacks, maybe a hot toddy, and curl up to wait for the snowfall. It is coming but no one knows when! But that is why we have fake snow, right?

Christmas On The Slopes | 2022 Christmas Movies

So this movie is called Christmas On The Slopes but it’s about chefs. Sure, they are cooking at a ski resort but that has little to do the with actual movie. My mind is boggled.

Sophia (Soma Chhaya) is a celebrity chef. When her latest restaurant in Savannah, GA fails on opening night, Sophia decides to take a Christmas vacation at a luxury ski resort. As she sneaks into the kitchen for a snack, the head chef, Ansel (Olivier Renaud), mistakes her for his new sous chef. Sophia doesn’t correct him and ends up helping him cater a wedding for a famous fashion designer.

Once again, a movie that could have been completely avoided if the lead characters simply had a conversation. It’s difficult to believe that Sophia owns any restaurants, much less three. At no point does she assert herself. Instead, she allows Ansel to walk all over her. How in the world could she run two successful restaurants without being at least a little assertive? Even if you want to say that was all her business partner, she would have had to be a little assertive at some point to become as famous as she did.

In addition to the conflict being dumb, at no point did I believe that Sophia and Ansel were falling in love. Even at the end during the Big Declaration Of Love, I didn’t believe it. Sure, they were spending time together outside of the kitchen but none of it felt romantic.

When Christmas On The Slopes ended, I didn’t have a particularly strong feeling about it. Now that I am rethinking the movie, I think I hate it. There definitely isn’t anything appealing about it. And Sophia is a terrible character. I’m saying not to watch this one…unless you really badly need ideas for recipes. Even then, you won’t get the whole recipe, you’ll just get general ideas like “add cranberries to bread” or “put sage in stuffing.” Useless information, really.

A Big Fat Family Christmas | 2022 Christmas Movies

As I’ve said before, I don’t do any research when I’m making the annual list of Christmas movies to watch. So when I saw one titled A Big Fat Family Christmas, it sounded offensive. The question was - how was it going to be offensive?

Liv Rose Chan (Shannon Chan-Kent) is a photo-journalist in San Francisco. Every year, her family throws a huge holiday party for the community. But Liv doesn’t wants to keep her professional life separate from her personal life. When the new journalist, Henry (Shannon Kook), is assigned to cover the holiday party with help from Liv, her life gets turned upside down.

I don’t understand why they titled this movie A Big Fat Family Christmas. If this is an Asian reference, I would love if someone from the Asian community could leave a comment or email me to let me know. I would greatly appreciate it.

The movie itself isn’t too bad. It’s mostly filled with Liv trying to keep Henry away from her family, even though Henry seems to know somehow. But the big conflict comes when Liv and Henry lose a bunch of money the community donated for charity. Liv has to come to terms with her family and being a part of the community. These are issues that are super important but the movie doesn’t want to get too deep about it. Everything is kept on the surface, which is a little sad. But I guess I can’t expect too much from a Hallmark Christmas movie.

While I didn’t find this particular movie very compelling, I do want as many people to watch it as possible. Hallmark (and other channels) need to know that we, the people, want to see more than just lily white characters in our romance movies. Christmas At The Golden Dragon is the better Asian-American Christmas movie of the season but, honestly, we need more than just two movies a year. Maybe if a bunch of people watch both movies, we can get more diversity in our leading characters.