Dear Santa | 2024 Christmas Movies

This year Paramount+ gives us a Christmas movie starring Jack Black, Dear Santa. The trailers make it seem like it would be a fairly typical Jack Black movie. That doesn’t always mean it will be good.

Liam Turner (Robert Timothy Smith) is a dyslexic sixth-grader whose parents are constantly arguing. When he writes a letter to Santa with his Christmas wishes, he accidentally addresses it to Satan. That night, Satan (Black) shows up to grant Liam three wishes. But Satan’s idea of a good wish is very different from Liam’s.

For the most part, this wasn’t a terrible movie. It is, indeed, a rather typical Jack Black movie. He jumps around, acting crazy, while the main characters try to get him to calm down and listen. The twist with his character at the end was interesting but what he did at the end was annoyingly short-sighted. I don’t want to spoil it but that “wish” kinda screws up the whole happy ending. I’m thinking maybe they wanted to try to spin this off into a sequel? Though I’m not sure how that would work either.

Like a lot of Jack Black movies, Dear Santa is a watchable mess. You will probably enjoy it, even if you aren’t sure why you enjoy it. At least the Post Malone cameo was fun?

Rating: Be careful what you wish for

Confessions Of A Christmas Letter | 2024 Christmas Movies

Confessions Of A Christmas Letter is a bit of a departure from the usual Hallmark Christmas romance offerings. This one doesn’t actually focus on the romance! Instead, it hides in the background.

Settie (Angela Kinsey), the matriarch of the Rose family, loses the Best Christmas Letter contest every year. This year she has decided to hire Juan (Alec Santos), a Puerto Rican novelist, to write the letter for her. In order to make that happen, he’ll have to move in with the family so he can get to know them. At the same time, Settie’s daughter, Lily (Lillian Doucet-Roche), has come home from Italy for Christmas. Evil neighbor Sue (Colleen Wheeler), who happens to win the letter contest every year, assumes that Juan and Lily are engaged, meaning they now have to pretend to be engaged at every event in town.

I’ll admit that this is a weird premise for a movie. You would think that family Christmas newsletters would be a thing of the past. But the people who are into Christmas newsletters are INTO Christmas newsletters. The only part of this that seems really odd is the fact that they turned this into a contest. It’s begging for people to lie about what they (or their family) has done over the past year. The goal of the Christmas letter is simply to update people you don’t speak with frequently. Sending these letters to your friends and neighbors that we see you hanging out with is weird. It probably would have been better if this was a short story contest instead of a letter contest.

While a lot of people will complain that the acting in Confessions is over the top, it’s supposed to be over the top. The plot verges on ridiculous and it’s only the acting that keeps it from being Too Much. Crazy plot plus cheesy acting is a bit of a win in my book.

I do like that the romance isn’t front and center here. Since the plot revolves around Settie and the family dynamic, that is where the focus belongs. I would have loved to have seen a little more of the family and a little less of Settie vs Sue. Mostly because I think the central conflict of the movie is Settie going overboard to try to win the contest, not Sue being the Grinch of town. If they wanted to make Settie vs Sue the main conflict, they should have shown more of that. What is Sue’s motivation to be so mean to everyone? She already wins the contest every year. There isn’t a reason for her to try to tear the family apart. We shouldn’t have characters be mean just to be mean. There should be something more behind them.

So, should you watch Confessions? Sure. You may not love it but there are definitely worse movies out there this year.

Rating: “Once upon a time” is a terrible way to begin a letter

A Cozy Christmas Quilt | 2024 Christmas Movies

This picture for A Cozy Christmas Quilt is hysterical. Ferelith Young’s arm disappears in the space between her face and Harmon Walsh’s. And I’m not sure what she’s supposed to be holding in her hands, which are at weird angles. It makes no sense. Almost like the movie itself.

Liam (Walsh) is a firefighter whose sister got engaged and wants to get married before the couple moves to Rome. Their family tradition is to get married at Christmastime so they only have a few weeks to get everything together. On top of that, it’s also tradition that the mother of the bride gift the couple a handmade Christmas quilt. Liam, not knowing how to sew, turns to Amy (Young), a fiber artist, to teach him how to make a quilt.

The most interesting thing about this movie is the sort-of rivalry between Amy and the woman that taught her how to quilt, Miriam (Jennifer Wigmore). Unfortunately, it is never expanded upon. Miriam says awful things straight to Amy’s face for absolutely no reason. They are both finalists in a competition but I don’t think that gives Miriam any reason to be terrible.

As for the rest of the movie, it’s fine. It’s the same boring stuff. Amy and Liam have very little chemistry, they spend most of their time doing non-quilting things, and they are just dull people. C’mon, Great American Family, give me something good!

Rating: The dullest Christmas quilt

Christmas At Plumhill Manor | 2024 Christmas Movies

Oh, Lifetime, why do you do this to me? Christmas At Plumhill Manor is their first Christmas movie of the year. And it stars Maria Menounos. I think I have to give in and admit that she’s not a good actress. She’s fine as a gossip show host or in minor roles but she should not be a leading lady.

Margot Stone (Menounos) is a New York City architect who, unexpectedly, receives Plumhill Manor as an inheritance from a recently deceased great-aunt. However, the will states that Margot must live in the manor for seven days before she can decide whether to keep or sell the property.

I don’t even want to talk about the movie. It’s boring. Nothing interesting happens. There’s a scavenger hunt and even that is boring.

With that out of the way, what I do want to talk about is the way this movie handles color. See, a lot of Christmas movies are filmed in the summer. That is how we get Christmas goodness in October. Of course, this means that the movie people have to think of creative ways to make the summer look like winter. Hallmark usually coats everything in fake snow. Lifetime, however, really likes to play with color…or lack of color. Whenever Margot is outside, everything is filmed in black and white with people and buildings re-colored in post-production. This leads to three amazing things: One - we get grey trees complete with leaves. These trees should not have leaves in December yet here they are, grey as can be. Two - the re-colored portions have such fake color that it makes me laugh. A red brick building doesn’t have deep red richness. No, it is red-ish with a sort of pink undertone making it look wrong. Three - they don’t un-color the trees we see in windows. So when Margot is walking around the manor and she walks past a window, we see a fully leaved green tree in the window. This is my favorite part of the color problem.

I don’t know why they chose to go with the color fix. I would think that it would be a lot cheaper to cover everything in fake snow. And I’m sure there could have been some creative shots to get around fully leaved trees. Thankfully, the colors did distract me from the terribleness that is Christmas At Plumhill Manor. It’s probably the only thing it has going for it.

Rating: Not even the pink brick manor can save it from a monotone world

Jingle Bell Run | 2024 Christmas Movies

Last year, my daughter made me watch a few of the past seasons of The Amazing Race. I think this prepared me to watch this year’s Hallmark movie, Jingle Bell Run. Which is basically Christmas-themed Amazing Race.

When all of Avery’s (Ashley Williams) family has other plans for Christmas, her sister signs her up for The Great Holiday Dash, a Christmas-themed race across the United States to win a million dollars. She gets paired with Wes (Andrew W. Walker), a recently retired professional hockey player trying to figure out what to do next in life. With her puzzle-solving skills and his physical prowess, the duo is destined to win the big prize.

Well, Jingle Bell Run may make the top 10 list this year. (Granted, we are still in November and there are a LOT of movies to go.) I thought that the premise was fresh and new, Williams and Walker had pretty good chemistry together, and I enjoyed how they featured a couple of the rival teams. The movie may have been a little bit better if they played up the rivalry between Wes and currently popular hockey player Nash (Jamall Johnson) but it is possible that would have made the movie too stuffy. Without that rivalry, we were given room to let the romance between Avery and Wed flourish. I would have just liked to see at least a little more between the two hockey players. As it was, Wes was jealous that Nash is a younger player and Nash barely knows who Wes is.

Overall, I did think the movie was fun. While I don’t think I would watch it again, it is definitely a contender on the best movie list of this year.

Rating: Maybe add few more stops around the United States

A Christmas Less Traveled | 2024 Christmas Movies

A Christmas Less Traveled is the first of the Candace Cameron Bure movies that are airing this year. I’m pretty positive that the second movie is a Hallmark movie that Great American Family somehow got the rights to….but that is for later discussion. Let’s see if this one is any good.

Desi (Bure) owns The Dine And Dash diner, which has fallen on hard times. In order to get out of debt, Desi puts her late father’s truck up for sale. Before she can sell it, she finds a cassette tape from her father leading her on a road trip through his past. Accompanying her is Grayson (Eric Johnson), a stranger who has been following Desi for a mysterious reason.

I really think I’m going to cut the Great American Family movies out of the schedule next year. Like almost all of the others, Less Traveled is boring. Desi meets up with her father’s old friends and tries to connect with them on a personal level but it felt so…impersonal. There were no connections with anyone. Even the whole love story with Grayson felt forced and unnatural.

Most years, I can count on Bure to give me a bland movie preaching the will of God that at least has decent acting. This time around, all that is left is “God’s plan.” I feel bad for the conservatives that left Hallmark for this drivel. They could have had much better movies.

Rating: Skip the road trip

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever | 2024 Christmas Movies

Thanks to my birthday and the US Thanksgiving holiday being in the same week this year, I have the whole week off from work. So I decided to spend yesterday at the movies watching The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. I did not know this was based on a 1972 book nor did I know there was a 1983 television movie. To be honest, I didn’t know a whole lot about the movie other than it was about a Christmas pageant and it starred Pete Holmes and Judy Greer.

The six Herdman kids - Imogene (Beatrice Schneider), Ralph (Mason D. Nelligan), Claude (Matthew Lamb), Leroy (Ewan Wood), Ollie (Essek Moore), and Gladys (Kynlee Heiman) - terrorize the neighborhood. They steal, they set fires, they smoke, they bully the other kids, and much, much worse. Sadly, their parents are nowhere to be found. Hearing that they can get free snacks at church, they show up for Sunday school on the day Grace Bradley (Judy Greer), the new director of the church Christmas pageant, is handing out roles. Imogene demands she play Mary while the rest of her siblings get the other main roles. The entire town of Emmanuel is sure that this will be the worst Christmas pageant in the history of the church.

First off, yes, this is a heavily Christian movie. They go into detail about the story of Jesus’ birth and the Herdman kids all ask great questions that most Christian movies do not answer. I’m not sure that the trailers properly prepared me for just how Christian this movie is. While that is fine for me, it may not be fine for everyone.

Next up, I’ve seen some reviews saying the kid actors in this are terrible. I didn’t think they were that bad. As a matter of fact, Schneider as Imogene had me crying toward the end of the movie. I almost never cry at movies - especially Christmas movies - and I didn’t expect to cry at this one. Imogene, as a character, didn’t really need a super dramatic actress. She needed someone who could play tough yet very occasionally show a vulnerable side. And I think Schneider pulled that off.

Is this a perfect movie? No. While the movie does end on a happy-ish note, I expected the Hollywood happy ending. We did not get that and I think the movie may have been worse as a result. I also would have loved to have seen Beth (Molly Belle Wright), who is the one telling this entire story, try to actually be friends with Imogene when they started to connect. Maybe this is more of a criticism of their particular church. Those adults were the absolutely terrible kinds of Christians that hate people not like themselves and don’t reach out to those in need. They all knew these kids were unsupervised and not one of them attempted anything to make it better. I was hoping that Beth would befriend Imogene and the Bradley family would sort of take the Hardmans in as honorary family members to show them what family is. But nah, they got the play, that is all they needed.

I can see this movie becoming a sort of classic like A Christmas Story but I’m not sure it really deserves it. If you are looking for a decent “reason for the season” type of movie, this should whet your whistle. But if you are looking for a feel good comedy, it will probably let you down. Do with that what you will.

Rating: Come for Imogene, stay for Gladys.

Christmas With The Singhs | 2024 Christmas Movies

I originally thought Christmas With The Singhs was going to be a wacky “white guy learns about other cultures” movie. Kinda like what we had with Mistletoe & Menorahs back in 2019. Alas, it is not that type of movie. There was such potential and they wasted it.

Asha (Anuja Joshi) and Jake (Benjamin Hollingsworth) reconnected after graduating high school 18 years ago. After dating for a year, Jake proposes…without getting her father’s permission first. As they spend their first Christmas as an engaged couple together, can they meld their Christmas traditions together or will this tear them apart?

This really would have been a great way to highlight the differences between an Indian family Christmas and a white American family Christmas. Instead, what we get is Asha’s father, Samuel (Manoj Sood), rudely demanding that the couple do absolutely everything his family does while ignoring everything Jake’s family does. While I haven’t experienced it myself, I have heard that Asian families are rather strict about things. But this is insane. Thankfully, Asha’s mother, Nirmila (Nimet Kanji), is more understanding but that is probably because her family gave up their Hindu religion to join Samuel’s Catholic religion. She understands the sacrifice they made and how difficult it was to combine their families. Samuel is too set in his ways (or maybe selfish) to think about what would make his daughter happy.

I want to say the movie itself isn’t terrible. The acting and the script are pretty good. But it is really difficult to look past the fact that it is mostly Samuel stomping around whining about Asha ignoring her family when the couple spends most of their time WITH her family and actually ignoring his family. It all comes together in the end, of course. And I would love to maybe see a sequel where they truly highlight the things that each family does to make the season special to them. This just wasn’t it.

Rating: Samuel reading a story to children was really THE most important part of their tradition?

A Reason For The Season | 2024 Christmas Movies

Now we’re heading back over to Hallmark Mystery with A Reason For The Season. Is it a mystery? Not really. But I’ve now resigned myself to the knowledge that this is the channel Hallmark uses for all of the non-traditional romance movies. Which is fine.

Thirty-five years ago, Elizabeth Lane (Taylor Reid in the flashback, Sarah-Jane Redmond in the present time) suddenly gave birth to her daughter, Evie (Taylor Cole), in a small town diner with the help of six strangers. Now, realizing that her adult daughter doesn’t appreciate the wealth she has built, Elizabeth sends Evie back to that small town to find the six strangers and grant their Christmas wishes. With the help of Kyle (Kevin McGarry), the only lawyer in town, Evie sets her sights on completing her mother’s challenge.

This is one of those movies that could have gone very wrong. We get a lot of “spoiled rich girl goes good” type of Christmas movies. And a lot of them are bad. Thankfully, I didn’t think A Reason For The Season was that bad. It’s a Hallmark movie so of course there is some terrible dialog and a handful of cheesy acting. But I thought that the actors got the message across well enough.

I suppose, if I had to find something bad with the movie, I would say that it was a little unbelievable that someone with access to THAT much money wouldn’t have gotten a credit card or driver’s license in their fake name instead of pretending they keep forgetting their stuff all over the place. It wouldn’t have been that difficult for Evie to get everything she needed to make herself successful. Especially if she was just giving away $1,000 diamond tennis bracelets. But, to be honest, this is a small nitpick. It was a little annoying that she had to keep hiding her real name but it didn’t ruin the movie. In the end, it was still decent.

Rating: Can I get my Christmas wish granted too?

Hot Frosty | 2024 Christmas Movies

I think someone at Netflix hired some Gen Zs to run their Christmas movie slate this year. You can’t tell me that a Gen Xer or Millennial came up with Hot Frosty. And there are two more Netflix movies coming up with additional weird plots. We are in for some craziness this Christmas.

After losing her husband to cancer, Kathy’s (Lacey Chabert) life began to fall apart. She manages to keep her diner going but her house is in major need of repairs. And she can’t even think of dating again. Thrift store owners Mel (Sherry Miller) and Theo (Dan Lett) give Kathy the red scarf that led them to fall in love with each other. Disbelieving in the magic charm, Kathy puts the scarf on a muscular snowman entered in the town’s snow sculpture competition. That night, the snowman, Jack (Dustin Milligan), comes to life, bringing more than just muscles to the town.

There are people out there that did not like this movie. I am not one of them. And to say I’m skeptical about Christmas movies is an understatement. Sure, Hot Frosty has a ridiculous plot but so do many of the best Christmas movies. As a matter of fact, I think this movie had similar vibes to Elf, which is one of the most popular Christmas movies out there. It probably won’t make it to the same cult movie status that Elf has but I don’t think it should be written off as terrible either.

I think maybe my only complaint about this movie is that they were given comedic heavy hitters in Craig Robinson and Joe Lo Truglio and they are both severely underused. Robinson’s cop character is supposed to be one of those “so serious about their job it’s funny” and Lo Truglio is supposed to be his dim-witted deputy. However, neither of them are playing it straight. It’s not funny if the actors are playing it funny. Sadly, the funniest part they get is the song they sing over the ending credits, which is a callback to the song they sing in the cop car. I would have loved to see them play both of the roles more seriously. They would have stolen the movie.

Despite that minor setback, I do recommend watching it. Keep an eye out for a couple of Mean Girls references!

Rating: How much does snowman home repair cost?