The Holiday Junkie | 2024 Christmas Movies

There are some years that we get a really sad Christmas movie. A movie so sad that I’m not sure why anyone would want to release it during the Christmas season. The Holiday Junkie just might make that list.

Andie (Jennifer Love Hewitt) ran a holiday decorating company with her mother. After her mother passes away, Andie is left to run the company on her own. With help from Mason (Brian Hallisay), Andie works through her grief as she plans some epic holiday events.

This movie was written and directed by Jennifer Love Hewitt in memory of her own mother, who passed in 2012. Keeping that in mind, you’ll understand why I say this movie is so sad. There are a number of scenes where Hewitt breaks down in tears and you can’t help but feel bad for her. I think she was able to feel this vulnerable on screen because Mason in played by her real life husband, who she has been married to since 2013. The feelings that you see on screen feel so real and so raw. Of course, this is good for the movie but it may be very triggering to some people. Especially this time of year.

While the acting and the story are both amazing, it is a little annoying that almost all of the main characters have some sort of big trauma. Sure, everyone has some sort of trauma but this is a Christmas movie. We don’t need 3 out of the 4 main characters being traumatized over relationships. To be honest, it would have been nice to have more than just best friend Darren (Greg Grunberg) as the comic relief. A little more levity may have made this feel a bit more appropriate for the Christmas season.

Rating: Bring a whole box of tissues with you

Hanukkah On The Rocks | 2024 Christmas Movies

Hanukkah On The Rocks is this year’s Hallmark Hanukkah movie. I am so glad that it wasn’t Leah’s Perfect Gift. That would have been sad.

Tory (Stacey Farber) is a lawyer who gets laid off shortly before the first day of Hanukkah. While debating where to go with her life, she finds herself temporarily bartending at Rocky’s, a local dive bar. With the help of bar regular, Sam (Marc Summers), and his son, Jay (Daren Kagasoff), Tory figures out what is really important to her.

Most of the time, I find the annual Hanukkah movie to be better than some of the Christmas movies. And this year is no different. I loved that Hanukkah isn’t just a background holiday that happens to be celebrated as the plot progresses. No, there are actual celebrations with lighting the candle each night, kids playing dreidel, and Tory creating specialty themed cocktails. And since the bar was celebrating every night, they welcomed all of their patrons to celebrate, not just the Jewish ones. It was so refreshing after the awfulness of Leah’s Perfect Gift.

The only negative I have for the movie is the secondary conflict between Tory, Jay, and Sam. I don’t want to spoil that part of the plot but I really don’t understand why Jay got upset about it. Especially at Tory. It was another of those “Why didn’t you tell me this?” - “Because they asked me not to!” types of conflicts and I hate those. Don’t blame the person who was asked not to tell. Blame the person that did the asking. Thankfully, it’s not the main conflict and it’s solved pretty quickly. So it doesn’t really ruin the beauty of the rest of the movie.

Rating: Can we get non-alcoholic versions of those drinks?

All I Need For Christmas | 2024 Christmas Movies

The title for All I Need For Christmas reminds me of those Blake Shelton Time For Christmas movies. Thankfully, this is not in that series. So let’s see what it is.

Maggie (Mallory Jansen) is a singer/songwriter who is having trouble getting her career off the ground, blaming technology for making all music sound the same. After her touring gig has been cancelled, she returns to her family’s Christmas tree farm for the holiday. There she meets Archer (Dan Jeannotte), a man with family troubles whose tech company is about to launch two new apps for musicians. Maybe the two of them can help each other in more ways than they originally thought.

When I turned this movie on, I didn’t think I would like it. Boy, was I surprised. In these sort of movies, one of the main characters is usually kinda terrible and they get turned around by the others. On the contrary, both of these people are fairly nice. Sure, Maggie is a little mean to Archer at the beginning when she finds out he runs a tech company but she quickly learns that she was wrong and actually apologizes to him. TWICE! And Archer tries everything he can to stay a normal, even-keeled person, even when his sister, Piper (Emily Tennant), tries to push his buttons.

Despite All I Need For Christmas airing on the subpar Hallmark Mystery channel, I do recommend watching it. It has the perfect synergy between cheesy, saccharine, and conflict. I think this is one that almost anyone would enjoy.

Rating: Can I pet them pigs?

Leah's Perfect Gift | 2024 Christmas Movies

It has been a long time since a movie made me angry. Leah’s Perfect Gift made me so angry that I almost didn’t finish the movie. As a matter of fact, I had to stop watching it halfway through and take a break. This may be a long rant.

Leah (Emily Arlook) is a Jewish woman who is so excited to experience her first Christmas with her boyfriend, Graham’s (Evan Roderick), family. Much to her dismay, everything she does seems to upset Graham’s mother, Barbara (Barbara Niven). Is there any way Christmas can be saved?

Uuuuuggghhhh. I know this was supposed to be a “bad mother-in-law” type of movie. But Barbara isn’t Leah’s mother-in-law and, more importantly, this is the first time they are meeting. Barbara is so mean and vile to Leah and neither Graham nor his sister, Maddie (Sidney Quesnelle), stood up for Leah. They both basically shrug and say “Yep, Mom is like that!” And we’re talking STUPID stuff like “Mom doesn’t like it when people rip wrapping paper.” So absolutely everyone around her has to carefully pull apart the tape to open every single present. At no point does anyone say “Hey, she’s just excited to celebrate Christmas for the first time. Let’s give her a little leeway to our insane traditions.”

The worst part of all of this is Leah is still so gracious and amazing toward everyone, no matter how awful they are to her. At the end, Barbara is having some sort of mental breakdown in a coat closet and it’s LEAH that goes in to comfort her. If I was Leah, I would tell that woman to eat rocks and I would definitely not accept her lame apology. Barbara does not deserve forgiveness.

I really wanted this to be Hallmark’s one cool Hanukkah movie this year. I seriously hope that this is not it. Because, even though we got a kickass Hanukkah party in the beginning - where Leah’s parents ACCEPTED Graham and taught him some of their traditions - this was not a Hanukkah movie. Do better, Hallmark.

Rating: Burn it down with a menorah

A Very Merry Beauty Salon | 2024 Christmas Movies

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a beauty salon-themed Christmas movie. I definitely haven’t seen a black beauty salon-themed Christmas movie. I hope that Lifetime doesn’t mess it up with A Very Merry Beauty Salon.

Sienna (Tia Mowry), who owns Divine Beauty Salon, does a lot of charitable work for her community. Now she is being honored at the annual Tinsel Ball in Atlanta. As she prepares for the ball, she meets Lawrence (RonReaco Lee). He is the CEO of his family’s wine business, which has is not only opening a shop near Sienna’s beauty salon, they are also co-sponsoring the ball. The sparks begin to fly between Sienna and Lawrence but will business and family get between them?

While I think that A Very Merry Beauty Salon was a wonderful movie, it was also very slow. Instead of action, we get a lot of scenes of people just sitting around talking. I think the only action montage we get is of Sienna, Ella (Ashli Auguillard), and Miss Kimmy (Cocoa Brown) working on their clients’ hair. There is a scene where Sienna and Lawrence are practicing a dance but I wouldn’t really call that a montage. As a result, the movie does seem to drag a little. Which is sad because the acting is amazing and the plot could have been so much more interesting. It felt like the writers weren’t really sure how to move the actors from scene to scene.

Despite the slowness of the movie, I do think it is watchable. As a matter of fact, I think I would love to see a series about Sienna, Ella, and Miss Kimmy. They were such fun to be around. We need more of them.

Rating: Can I come to the salon?

Sugarplummed | 2024 Christmas Movies

I am going to call it now - unless something magical happens in the (approximately) 20 movies left to watch this season, Sugarplummed will, in fact, be my number one movie this year. When I heard the title, I thought it was dumb. When I heard the plot, I thought it was dumb. Man, I couldn’t be more wrong.

Emily (Maggie Lawson) wants to give her family the perfect Christmas. But, every year, something goes wrong. As she prepares for Christmas this year, she finds a star ornament that promises a Christmas wish. Exhausted and irritated, she wishes that she could fulfill her list that would make Christmas picture-perfect like the Sugarplum Christmas movies. Much to her surprise, Sugarplum (Janel Parrish), herself, appears to make all of Emily’s Christmas wishes come true.

Like I said, I really did think this movie was going to be stupid. I should know Hallmark better. Sometimes they don’t mind poking a little fun at themselves. And that is exactly what they do here. Instead of having a variety of movies that all seem the same, they fake Hallmark channel in the movie just uses the same character, Sugarplum, in the lead of all of their movies. So Sugarplum has saved small town businesses, dated secret princes, and even brought the Christmas spirit to the humbugs. And Parrish was perfectly cast as the princess of Christmas.

At the same time, Lawson has perfected playing the “imperfect woman.” You can’t help but believe that she is trying her very best even when the results are the absolute worst. Pairing Lawson with Parrish was probably the best decision a casting director ever made.

And, of course, there has to be a conflict, right? The movie can’t keep going up, up, up. There are actually two problems that need to be solved and neither of them felt forced. The writer/director of Sugarplummed, Ryan Landels, has written some stinkers (I’m looking at you, Jem & The Holograms movie) but his Christmas movies aren’t too bad. Maybe this is your lane, dude.

Rating: I want more movies with Sugarplum…like the Mrs. Miracle movies!

Once Upon A Christmas Wish | 2024 Christmas Movies

Don’t let anyone tell you that Great American Family doesn’t love nepotism. Many of the actors in Once Upon A Christmas Wish are from the same family. And the only other child with lines in the movie is related to the writer/director. This was a bad decision.

Brian Ortega (Mario Lopez) is the mayor of Long Grove. As he prepares the town for Christmas, he finds his 4th grade letter to Santa, complete with wish list. Surprisingly, the items on his wish list begin to come true. When his former classmate, Nina (Courtney Lopez), coming back to town, his wish list really can be complete.

In case you didn’t know, Mario and Courtney Lopez are married. Their son, Dominic, plays Joey, a writer for the school newspaper. And the director’s daughter plays Hannah, a girl at Joey’s school who made a box to gather letters for Santa. To be honest, none of that works. Even though their actors have been married for over a decade, Brian and Nina barely seem to like each other. They only hang out and talk because they haven’t seen each other in a long time. You wouldn’t think they are boring but they are.

Also, this movie is a musical. It’s not marketed as a musical but it is. Normally, I love musicals. But Mario’s dancing in this is so wooden that, every time he is given choreography, I am immediately taken out of the movie. Courtney, meanwhile, gets all of the singing that isn’t delegated to a children’s choir. She’s a decent enough singer but the song she sings over and over is bad. I will give her credit that she is a better dancer than Mario. But that isn’t saying much.

Rating: Santa wasted his powers on this wish list

Private Princess Christmas | 2024 Christmas Movies

Hallmark has given us another royal Christmas movie but Private Princess Christmas has a bit of a twist to it. It sounds interesting. But is it actually interesting?

Violet (Ali Skovbye) is the princess of Wingravia. She loves all of the perks of being a princess but hates all of the responsibilities. After disappointing her mother, the Queen (Erica Durance), one too many times, Violet gets sent to a boot camp that specializes in turning spoiled brats into leaders.

While Private Princess Christmas did have a fresh plotline (at least for Christmas movies), I don’t think it was executed very well. First off, Ryan (Derek Klena), the soldier in charge of the boot camp, is way too easy on the cadets. Boot camp is supposed to be difficult. That is why it’s boot camp. And we’re talking about a boot camp for spoiled brats. Why would you give into anything they wanted? Instead of being strict and following the rules exactly, Ryan gave in and let them basically do whatever they wanted. Even when they broke the rules of their given tasks, there was no consequence. What was the point of sending anyone there?

Second, the entire reason that Violet was acting out and the Queen (who never actually gets a name) is so distant with her daughter is because the King passed away earlier in the year. So both of them are grieving and ignoring each other. They don’t need boot camp, they need therapy!

There was so much potential for this movie. There are plenty of fish-out-of-water movies where someone gets sent to boot camp to become a better person and those are witty and funny and enjoyable. This was none of those. And I actually wanted to like this one.

Rating: Is there a rank lower than private?

A Dance In The Snow | 2024 Christmas Movies

So let me get this right - The Christmas Quest, a movie about an actual mystery, is on the main Hallmark Channel while A Dance In The Snow, a movie about an autistic girl and her mother, is on Hallmark Mystery. Make it make sense, Hallmark!

Jenny (Vanessa Burghardt) is an autistic high school senior. Her mother, Melanie (Erica Cerra), does everything she can to make Jenny’s life easier, including opening a center for autistic people. When the school’s winter dance rolls around, Jenny doesn’t want to go due to a bad experience the previous year. As a surprise for Jenny, Melanie, with some help from Jenny’s literature teacher Daniel (Mark Ghanimé), decides to join the dance planning committee in order to make the dance more accessible for everyone. Meanwhile, Jenny and her friends decide to plan their own winter dance as a surprise for Melanie. Love begins to bloom for both women but, thanks to the secrecy, their relationship falters a little.

This was a pretty sweet movie. It was nice to see an autistic actor (Burghardt) playing an autistic character. Usually the directors give some lame excuse about how difficult it is to find someone or work with them. A Dance In The Snow proves those excuses wrong.

With that said, I don’t know that this movie is for everyone. The plot does move pretty slowly and there isn’t a ton of action happening. However, it really is a nice break from the insanity that is the traditional Hallmark Christmas movie.

Rating: There’s no Christmas but there is snow

The Christmas Quest | 2024 Christmas Movies

The Christmas Questsounds like a movie that belongs on Hallmark Mystery. But since it stars Hallmark’s main leading lady, Lacey Chabert, it is on the main Hallmark channel. I’m not sure if this is a good or bad thing.

Stefanie Baxter (Chabert) is an archeologist whose mother (Erin Cahill) spent most of Stefanie’s childhood searching for an Icelandic treasure. When Stefanie is approached by Victor (Derek Riddell) to help search for the treasure, she jumps on board. Unfortunately, she needs help from her ex-husband, Chase (Kristoffer Polaha), an expert in ancient Norse languages. Can they find the treasure before it ends up in the wrong hands?

I admit that I am a fan of the National Treasure-type movies. Give me some good puzzles (that I don’t have to solve myself) and a good adventure and I am happy. The Christmas Quest does bring in some Icelandic folklore, which was really cool to see. Unfortunately, that is the coolest thing in the movie. The puzzles didn’t seem particularly difficult if you know the folklore they are referencing (which most of the people in the movie seemed to know), the “bad guys” didn’t seem all that dangerous, and the end was a cop-out. This is, yet again, another movie that isn’t absolutely terrible but it isn’t particularly worth watching either. Maybe if you are a big fan of Lacey Chabert you’ll like it?

Rating: More Yule Lads, less of everything else